Monday, August 2, 2010

on my mind...

I feel like everything is a bit chaotic these days. Like I can't quite get a handle on life and it's making me a bit nervous to bring a baby into this world, this home, this life that is kind of crazy.

Today was supposed to be our organizing day. The day that we would prepare Charlotte's room and have it ready to fit clothes and items for both girls. The day I would have the bins of clothes sorted and labelled and stacked neatly in the basement. And.... it didn't happen. Charlotte was sick with a fever on Saturday night and Sunday and still didn't feel quite herself today. I ended up caring for her and nursing a lot while Tim ran around, and did a lot of cleaning/throwing out stuff that was in the basement (which needed to be done, and there is still a long way to go). Then we went out to the cottage for a much needed escape from the house and a swim.

I am worried that not being physically prepared... not having a dresser for the baby and having a space organized will somehow make her not feel welcome and wanted in this house. That squeezing in an office for the business (and all the "stuff" that comes with), and bedroom space for 4 in a small two bedroom house is pretty much impossible. Despite the fact that I desperately love this baby and I KNOW that all she needs is milk and love and someone to hold her close and change her when she needs it, I can't seem to get past this mental block. I can't seem to get a hold of what truly matters and embrace the truth and simplicity of what a newborn really needs. I think that I'm just worried and overwhelmed and well, tired!

My little "material" wishes and desires these days are for newborn cloth diapers.... I've been tempted by some kijiji deals! Also, these necklaces! (I've been hinting for a while now!!) And a creative and nice looking storage solution for the girl's clothes in their bedroom.

Oh, and it's World Breastfeeding Week! Check out this challenging article and tell me what you think! And stay tuned for a post on breastfeeding... and how I have been challenged and encouraged when it comes to preparing for tandem nursing.

1 comment:

  1. Oh, do I ever know how you feel! I've been trying to get the house "ready", but my time is already so maxed out that I can't seem to get anything done. You're right, though. The baby needs milk, warmth and love - and I've lots of that! I guess the rest is my own wish list and I'll get to it in due time (I hope!).